Always Start With A Plan....

Even before the night begins in full, make sure you've got your gameplan for the evening's entertainment completely sorted and your ultimate hopes fully fleshed out.

When your girl asks whether her makeup looks okay, you say yes. If her face looks like this and she asks, you say yes. It's a hard and fast rule.

You ever seen Vin Diesel in The Fast & The Furious film saga, well, thats me, thats exactly how i drive, i live to drive fast, nothing can catch me i'm.... WAIT .... Is that a cop car over there. Damn, better slow down!

Ever loved your electrical gadget so much you could eat it? Well now you can! You've heard how the Scottish like a deep friend Mars bar, right? Well, this is the next step. OM NOM NOM!!!

Prepare to witness a journey from pretty girl to hot chick to human sink plunger in only 7 years. It's a good lesson in the IS a limit to trying to look beautiful - OMG!

Hey you! Yeah you, working away there. Stop what you're doing and follow what this shoe shop sign's telling you to do. And if anyone questions your perverted activity, just show them the sign and tell them to join in. Fap.

If social networking was a thing back in the 1940s, this sort of thing would have totally happened. I wouldn't have known as I'd be to busy face-stalking Marilyn Monroe...

We've seen it in many films over the years, from Back to the Future to Terminator and beyond. They told us that that was all it was: fiction. But now , finally, here's undisputed proof that time travel does exist. Mind = blown.

Has this young lady got no shame? No humility? No dignity? What has the world come to when teenage women cavort their wares openly for any old pervert to come along get an eye full. Scandalous.

Wow, that is pretty GOTH! Well, I'm so Ozzy that I bite the heads off the bats she shits!

Surf's up dooood! Go grab your submarine and let's tackle some gnarly waves, you bodacious seaman. Like, using surfboards is just so 1977, it's all about the nuclear submarines these days.