TAKEAWAY DOODLES

People are requesting doodles on their takeaway boxes, with surprising results. I'd be scared that the surly recipient of my order would decide to smear his or her own bodily excretions on my food rather than getting arty.

It takes place on the second day of Easter and is guaranteed to make all girls wet (no, not in the way your pervy mind works), it is a peculiar custom of splashing females with cold water to purify them.

Ah, the internet, where the pretty girls are either kinda fat, ugly, both, or not females at all but old men. It's all trickery. These girls have mastered the clever use of angles to conceal what they really look like. Scary.

Puppies, kittens, lambs, calfs, you name it - if they are the animal world's newest editions and wrapped in soft fuzzy fur then our brain switches into mushy-gooey-mode and all we want to do is cuddle them and keep them safe.

I bet you were all thinking i was talking about something else, you did, didn't you? Well, you were only half-right, this is the ultimate double damsel delight. Yep, twins. Just imagine it, you will think you are seeing double perfection.

Japan is the future and parts of it are stranger than a lot of science fiction. Where the men are schoolgirls, the schoolgirls are pillows and the women are being probed by tentacle monsters. It really is my kinda place.

Butter-wouldn't-melt girl next door types are all well and good but they're not as much fun as a hell raising bad girl. Here's a gallery full of ladies who don't wait until halloween to dress like they're on the game.

The word 'weird' really doesn't do justice to some of these. They are without doubt the most ridiculous and bizarre collection of wedding day snaps that has ever been assembled. Happiest day of their lives?

If you've never gazed at a movie poster and popped a chubby while you drooled, then you're obviously not looking at the right movie posters. Here's a selection of 40 of the best cinematic delights. Enjoy them, you dirty cinephile.

Some of the planets most atrocious fur fancying FAILS in human form. What at first glance might look like a convention for football mascots is actually a a hive of scum, villainy & sexual perversion that'd make Fritzl want to upchuck.

WARNING: Only look at these pictures if you fully understand the fact that once seen you will never be able to unsee and look at any cute celeb (of in fact any girl) ever again - scary as f#ck!