I Have No Idea...

Pets are good at certain things, like licking their crotches, shedding on your clothes and getting under your feet before you manage to reach the lightswitch, but ask then to fix your car and they're utterly useless.

Movie magic really is a hell of a thing. They can take an average looking actor and turn him into a 7 foot tall monster, or a midget with hairy feet. Also they can take Chuck Norris and make him look like, well, Chuck Norris. Amazing.

"To have a good time - gooood time!" - Who the hell wrote that, obviously a 40yr old virgin who had No idea what they were singing about and probably never will.

Lets be honest most guys are pretty much dirty dogs when it comes to chicks and when they don't think anyone is watching them, or they are with their friends they're even worse. So when we get busted it's pretty damn funny.

Butter-wouldn't-melt girl next door types are all well and good but they're not as much fun as a hell raising bad girl. Here's a gallery full of ladies who don't wait until halloween to dress like they're on the game.

More exciting than watching your first child being born whilst walking on the moon on an IV drip of cocaine, or winning the superbowl & then discovering you have superpowers. Too bad you won't remember it in the morning.

It was called Haboob and it descended on the desert city of Phoenix, Arizonia like a plague from the heavens, dropping visibilities to near zero and coating surfaces with a gritty later of dust and sand. Hell is coming people.

Time for moar photographic evidence to prove that women and alcohol are possibly the greatest combination ever - It's like the perfect blend of cutie chemistry.

Not all human beings of the XX chromosome have the urge to do the duckface when they be self-shooting in the bathroom/bedroom mirror. Some reckon that a smile and some tight clothing will just bloody well suffice.

Hailing from the North Shore of Kauai, cute Alana Blanchard is one of the top 5 most popular women surfers on Earth - She's down to earth, beautiful and charges infamous Banzai Pipeline. She's a pin-up who can surf.

Eric Cartman might not be a fan of the Titian look but if you're not dreaming of daywalkers by the end of this gallery then I'll eat my hat. And dye my hair red.