T and A in the K

A gallery for the true chauvinists among us. For guys who aren't quite comfortable looking at ladies unless they're in front of a cooker or building a delicious sammich for their man. OM NOM NOM NOM.

Getting a tattoo is a very personal thing, so get it right. If you're going to get something indelibly inked under your skin, visible to all, you'd better make a statement. Something meaningful. "I like McDonalds" is a perfect example.

As the old saying goes, "you don't look at the mantel when you're poking the fire" - I guess you could avoid the horror with a brown paper bag, or better yet, a Halloween mask :(

It takes place on the second day of Easter and is guaranteed to make all girls wet (no, not in the way your pervy mind works), it is a peculiar custom of splashing females with cold water to purify them.

For some of us that sit at a computer all day, having the odd slice (or 10) of pizza to keep us going, the thought of shedding the pounds and toning up to a six-packed muscle-bound human might seem impossible. Apparently though it isnt.

It's clothing with inappropiate slogans that there should be laws against their owners wearing. If your opinions can sometimes be offensive to certain people then the best thing to do is get a T-shirt with them printed on the front.

As my dad used to say, "let sleeping girls lie", or was that dogs, who cares! There is something mesmerizing watching a cutie cuddle up and close her eyes - I LOVE the total vulnerability of a female when she is fast asleep.

Splitstastic is an expression used to embody the pure awesomeness of attractive ladies doing the spits. You'll never look at ladies in the same way again.

When people are making out and someone takes a picture it's your duty to get in the back on that shot and pull a stupid face. If you don't you're letting society down.

Who the hell is she, you may ask? Well she's a flipping hot Finnish starlet called Anna Falchi - Born waay back in 1972, she nevertheless looks amazing, with a body you'd be happy to find on a woman at least 15 years younger!

I'm throwing a party and all these girls are invited! Come one, come all and bring your friends, as long as they have big butts and their idea of dressing up is to go out in a thong or micro-bikini. Res ipsa loquitur. Let the good times roll.