Honest Apple Employee

Seeing a sign like this hanging in the front window of the Apple store is, well, almost magical. Well done sir, sorry about the whole 'getting fired' thing.

Suck it 4Chan, the Beatles discovered LOLcats long before you ever existed!

Also known as Walter White. If you're a fan of Breaking Bad you're probably already throwing fistfuls of cash at you monitor while you read this. I know I am.

The ability to fall asleep at any time sounds cool, but if you're not in control of it, it goes from cool to crappy pretty damn fast. Especially when you're on a swing.

Being prejudiced to other earthlings is one thing, not to be tolerated but it's expected from our ignorant selves. But intolerance of aliens is just not on, arsenic or otherwise.

Wow, the view of the lake from the roof really is rather nice, in fact i could probably sit up here all day and watch this vision and feel completely satiated.

Yeah, you didn't really handle it, did you, Tom? I saw Jurassic Park, and I wouldn't say any of those dinosaurs were well handled. Sort it out, dude.

Hold on to your hats, gaming just got serious! Welcome to the future! All you will need is a feeding tube and you will never have to move again. It's like heaven in a toilet cubicle.

So you feeling hungry then? We can sort that for you with a tasty Chineese egg - In Dongyang City, locals eat the seasonal "virgin egg" boiled in the urine of virgin boys - OM NOM UGGH!

So there's three fine looking girls to choose from. The decision on which one to go for is made a little easier by this simple observation...."NONE OF THEM FOOL!" - Always check age fist instead of limber limbs.

Sometimes life is totally without meaning or cause, but if you happen to be a nerd there is a brief moment of hope. Take Geoffrey Arend for example, how did such a geek end up with the cute & curvy Christina Hendricks. Bastard.