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The Pussy Magnet Has Arrived
Something tells me that if anyone, ever, on the entire planet turns up at a party wearing this little gem around their neck then no red-blooded male who is there will be getting laid that night. Like a BOSS!
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If you've never felt the unbridled thrill of finding a delicious stray onion ring amongst your order of fries, you've been deprived of one of life's true joys. I weep for you.
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Whenever I'm feeling the sharp sting of writer's block, I too just start talking British. Brilliant, innit?
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Don't be freaked out by this, it's not like the internet is spying on you while you sit in front of it and fap to the abundance of hot chicks who are all over it. It's just magic, plain simple magic. OMFG!!!
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How many dead hookers does it take to spoil a stag do? Just the one. It can pretty much put a downer on most evenings really. The key is to not let them die, then everyone's happy.
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All you need to complete the illusion is go around telling people how incredibly rich and talented you are without pausing to take breath until they shoot you.
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Poor Miley, she's been getting a lot of bad press of late. Better a wild child than a boring prude I say. I wanna see her drunk and enjoying herself.
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So long as you noticed this little prank before you began the evacuation of the happy fudge tunnel, you might be alright. Otherwise it's gonna get messy...
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BFFs are so sweet, just look at these two darlings, one's a giant ogre with breath like a baby's diaper and a face not even a mother could love, with a friend who's a goofy ass. The other two are from the movie Shrek.
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I'm sure even Jesus would have thought this was funny..
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Yeah, Ariel was kinda cray-cray. If I was in his shoes I would have ran a mile. unless she was one of those fish parts on top, lady parts on bottom mermaids...
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