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Never Trust Your Friends
Fri 15th Mar
Especially if they tell you that keeping an elephant with irritable bowel syndrome in your basement is a swell idea. If they do I think you're legally entitled to kick them square in the balls.
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She's the adult entertainer who's been banged more times than a Mongolian battle drum. Who's eaten more meat than Fatty Arbuckle. But she's tried to reach over to the cultured side and act in art movies. So, you mad?
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Ladies, so you are meeting up with your boyfriend later on and you txt him a message to let him know what to expect that evening...BUT...You txt your dad by mistake. Never assume you can pull the wool over his eyes. FAIL!
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Ok, so maybe for most of us the sight of a pretty girl striking a duck-face post is enough to make us reach for the nearest receptacle to throw up in, but amazingly, not all of us!
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This vehicle will go from 0-60 in just over four seconds. Coincidentally that's also how long the battery will last if you turn on the stereo. Sweet ride, bro.
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The people who really need to be reading this probably won't understand what it's saying anyway..
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Because what could elevate your Christmas cheer more than painstakingly replacing every last light bulb on the christmas tree, one by one? Nothing. That's what.
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Worried that you might be cast out from the flock for owning a 'SO yesterday' iPhone 4 and haven't got enough cash to upgrade? Well fear not, for under one buck you can be the envy of all your lesser iPhone 4 buddies.
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This picture was taken shortly before the young driver pictured was tazed, beaten and lumbered with trumped up charges. Just kidding, he's white. He just got a ticket.
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Something tells me this poor pussy's 9 lives are about to run out very quickly - Awwww :(
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When your food starts to communicate with you as you dine with your girlfriend, you know you've found the girl to stick with for a while. Either that or you are on some serious medication.
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