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Bush's Worry of a New Threat
$50 Billion in protection from.. what? None other than the ever growing population of ZOMBIES! - LOL
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In honor of The Sound of Music's 50th anniversary and to celebrate its legacy, The Onion's head film critic, Peter K. Rosenthal (comedian Ron E. Rains), provides a touching tribute to the beloved film.
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Hummer must be getting desperate if they need to turn their cars into submarines as a sales gimmick.
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Meet Ms Shackleton. She creates her masterpieces using only her special patented Dribbly Paint Technique(tm). Brushes are for noobs, this chick does it all using bottle paints and the power of gravity.
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Chelsea makes luxury designer watches for adventurous, high-flying women. At the age of just 19 she went about setting up her own business, she also runs a group that supports and celebrates female stunt pilots.
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Okay so he's not THAT Mr Miyagi, but he's still pretty damn awesome. He's very skilled, has incredible balance and skates in a unique way to boot. Not that fast, but technical and picks awkward spots to skate.
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Pigeons beware, some devious scientist has managed to get the world's most ridiculous canine and stuff a turbo charger in it. No birdlife or postal worker will be safe now.
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A female driver leaves her car in neutral while she is shopping and it rolls onto the highway. She is not doing the female stereotype any favours with this kind of driving.
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A skater steps out of the way of a speeding car at the last moment but his board isn't so lucky.
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A fat girl does Disney, singing along like she was one of the ugly sisters from Cinderella and the ice surrounding her cold heart melted just enough to bring a little bit of joy into her life. Weirdly addictive viewing.
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Disappointed with the ending of the Harry Potter film series? Not enough Master Chief in it for you? Well fear not, here's how the last film should've ended. Maybe they can bring out a director's cut on the DVD?
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